Heaven

What I am about to say might make more than a few people unhappy with me. That’s pretty normal though, I have a knack for doing that. It is very controversial in today’s Christian community, what I am about to say, so read at your own risk.
Whenever someone dies I have seen and heard people saying oh so and so is now looking over you from heaven. Or, the ever popular, they are an angel now.
I don’t believe either, as a matter of fact the Bible dispels that quite handily.
Take for example: “And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away” (Revelation 21:4).
What that says to me is that everyone who is in Heaven is at perfect peace, no more tears, no more sorrow. If they are looking down at what is going on here, on earth, is that a peaceful existence? I think not, I for one, believe that if my mother saw how much I still grieve for her she would be saddened. Therefore not at perfect peace, there would be sorrow in her heart that I am sad.
Or, if my dad could see what the last couple of years of my life had been like, he would have been angry with me for putting up with so many things. Once again, not at perfect peace, his heart would be in pain for what I allowed to happen and how I was treated.
I don’t want to think that when we die that we will still know what is going on here on earth. I want to think of my mother walking down that street of gold, whistling her little heart out. When she was happy, she whistled, so I know she is whistling in heaven.
I want to think of my grandpa working on a car, or doing biblical research all day long. That is what made him happy.
My grandmother happily watching The Days of Our Lives and eating candy.
I don’t want them to have sorrow and tears in Heaven.
The Bible tells us other things as well: “The wolf and the lamb shall feed together, the lion shall eat straw like the ox, and dust [shall be] the serpent’s food. They shall not hurt nor destroy in all My holy mountain,” says the LORD (Isaiah 65:25).
What that says to me is that animals will be there, none will be harmful, poisonous or predatory. I’ll finally be able to pet a lion and I will be quite joyous.
We also do not turn into Angels, Angels are God’s creation, separate from man. God created man to have freewill and come to Him willingly, joyfully. Angels were created to do God’s bidding, to obey Him without condition or freewill.
When I die, I will not be watching what is happening on earth, I will be incredibly busy catching up with my mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, great aunt Effie and my son, Michael. I will also be seeing a host of aunts, uncles, cousins and now my brother Jesse.
I look forward to it, I am not afraid to die, I don’t want to die, well, ever, but I have no fear of it.
I will be petting lions, seeing Nocona and rejoicing at the throne of God.
If you don’t agree with me, well, that is your freewill, I for one, do not want to think that my dead loved ones are watching my every move. I want to know I am truly alone when I am in certain places and doing certain things.
As usual, any comments or disagreements can be issued here or sent to me at angie@angieworld.com

Missing

The beginning of August is always a little bumpy for me, Michael’s birthday is today August 9, my mom passed on August 11, and now August 3 will be a little rough as that is the day my brother Jesse passed.
As most of you know I am adopted, everyone should really know that by now as it is, for better or worse, part of my identity.
Jesse was the youngest of my siblings, he was 20 years older than I. Even at that, he was a really great big brother in my teenage years. Jesse always had a mischievous glint in his eyes, even as an adult, you could tell there was something there, just under the surface, waiting to come out. A funny joke, a stinging comeback (for which we are all famous for) or comforting words.
He was equal parts funny, sarcastic, caring and a good son to my parents.
There is one time in particular that always comes to mind:
One day I was sitting in the den watching television and Jesse walked in. He didn’t say a word he just sat down next to me. He sighed heavily instigating the tell me what’s wrong conversation.
He looked at me and said you know Angie I told my kids that they shouldn’t even try to think of anything ornery to do because I’ve done it all. There is nothing you can think of that I have not done.
He was right about that, he was a really ornery child according to my parents. The original Dennis the Menace, please note, in my family orneriness is a gift.
I looked at him and said you’re stupid, you didn’t give your kids a warning, you issued a challenge.
He looked at me and said I realize that now. He went on to say those kids of mine thought of things I would never have thought to do.
I laughed for a solid five minutes because I knew that was true.
All three of his children were true Testerman’s, funny, smart and mischievous in nature. All of those traits are considered positive in my family.
This world will miss his humor, the glint in his eyes, the smile that made you wonder what he was up to and when the other shoe would drop.
I am completely grateful my daughter, Elizabeth Anne, traveled to Owasso with me to say goodbye. There are many things I will never talk about here, just know, that girl is my rock star, my hero, my protector when needed.
As usual, any complaints, comments or just to tell me how awesome I am can be left here or sent to angie@angieworld.com

Single Woman Problems

Anyone ever have lawnmower issues? I’m not talking the machine kind. I’m talking the human kind.
When I first moved here the leasing company had hired a local man to mow the lawn. He did a good job and I hired him to mow the lawn on a permanent basis.
I told him I would like it mowed on Fridays if possible, he said he would fit me in.
Perfect, I was happy, his prices were reasonable and he could come on the day I needed him to. No issues, right?
The first week went by, no one showed, second week, I called and left a voicemail, I said I thought we had made arrangements and if he was not able to fulfill that please let me know so I could hire someone else.
He sends me a text and apologizes profusely saying he would be there the next day. He does show up, mowed the lawn, everything is good.
The next time he shows up on Saturday, at 8pm, to say I wasn’t happy would not be an understatement. I have to work on Sunday, be there early, 8pm on a Saturday is a huge inconvenience for me.
After he mows the lawn he comes to the door for payment, then it got weird, he just stood there talking. I just stared at him. He finally left and I finished out my evening rituals and then he started texting.
I just stared at the phone, why, oh why are you texting me, he was flirting. This was not happening, number one, I pay you, number 2, you are not reliable and last but not least you are not Dean Cain.
Before anyone gets up in arms saying I’m a snob because the man works with his hands, my dad was a mechanic, my ex-husband was a mechanic, my youngest son is an auto body technician and my oldest son runs an auto repair shop. My uncles worked on cars, my cousins, second cousins, I come from a long lineage of blue-collar workers.
So it goes on, I’m not very responsive, but I still need someone to mow the yard. Then comes the weekend where he was a no show on Friday, Saturday comes around, no-show, Sunday same song and dance. He finally shows on Monday, I had left the money under the welcome mat. He took the money and left, he finally shows back up on Wednesday.
I am incredibly fortunate my youngest son’s girlfriend, Elicia was there. She owns her own pool company so her truck basically looks like what people would associate with a man truck.
He mowed that lawn in lightning time, haven’t heard from him since.
I still needed someone to mow the lawn. Well, here’s the rub, I have a lawn mower. It wasn’t working, so I asked Alex to look at it last night.
He was able to fix it and it runs like a dream! I mowed my own yard! Alex did the front last night after he got the mower running. He wanted to make sure it was working.
I have a reliable lawn mower now, me.
I’m still not sure why he thought he could hit on me, I didn’t flirt, I didn’t invite that kind of attention. It was a little disconcerting.
I wonder if Dean knows how to fix a lawn mower, or how to mow a lawn.

Inspired by Kellie and Allen Evans

It’s no secret to anyone who knows me that I am a huge fan of Kellie Raspberry of the Kidd Kraddick in the morning show. Yesterday was the anniversary of Kidd Kraddick’s passing, the whole show is in my prayers. Kidd’s death hit me hard, and I had never met him in person. However I invited him and the crew into my home and car every weekday morning. They have made me laugh, cry and think, without Kidd they have carried on admirably.
Which gets me to the heart of my thoughts today, I have been listening to Kellie and her new husband, Allen in their podcast. A Sandwich and Some Lovin’. I love the name.
Well during one of them they were talking about how Allen makes a bucket list every year. It is not New Years Resolutions of doing better on a diet or anything like that. He actually makes a list of things he wants to accomplish during the year. I thought wow, that seriously makes sense, why wait until you are on death’s door to make a list of things to do. Why not do that yearly while you are healthy and can enjoy doing those things.
It’s kind of late this year for me, I am out of vacation days due to the kind of year I have had, however I am thinking ahead to next year.
On my list for next year is the trip to Wyoming/Montana, Yellowstone Park with some friends. 4th of July in Florida, I hope to talk Elizabeth Anne into going with me. I really want to see the Disney Fireworks for 4th of July. I think that would be spectacular.
Comic Con San Diego will be on my list for 2019, I will have to really budget for that one. It has been my dream for many years to go. I think about how much fun that would be, so many geeks, nerds, dorks, comic loving, science fiction aficionados in one place! I would literally be in heaven!
I will be thinking of other things to put on my list as well.
Following their love story and listening to them with their new podcast has also done something else for me. It has made me hopeful for the future. Now I am not so sure the alone life is what I will end up with.
Perhaps I will meet Dean Cain and we will fall head over heels in love with each other. Or maybe a Dean like man, we’ll see.
Until then I intend to live a life that honors God in every way I can. I will enjoy this life He has given me and I will do and see as much as I can.
If you have any thoughts on this you can comment or you can always reach me at angie@angieworld.com

Hello, I’m Angie

Do you ever just look in a mirror and think wow, God does really good work. Just me? Seriously? You should try it sometime, does wonders for your self-esteem.
So, I have a giant pet peeve, I really can’t hold it in any longer, something happened a few days ago and it really is bothering me.
There are very few people that get to call me Angela, it’s a handful of people. I hate it when people call me Angela that do not have permission to do so.
Angie, that is my name, it has been my name since I was 12, you see when my mother acquired me, she looked at me and said Angela is a snob name and you are not a snob (wishful thinking on her part) I’m going to call you Angie. Henceforth I have been Angie. Looking back I do believe it was her way of getting to name her daughter. Since she didn’t have that luxury when I was born.
So Angie I became, I have since become the embodiment of an Angie if you will.
To the person who stated me off on this tangent, I have known you since the 8th grade. We have drank together, we popped Dexatrim together, we pretended to look for jobs together. You called me Angela? Seriously? It’s as if we never knew one another.
I am offended, disgusted, disheartened and dismayed and downright insulted.
You never knew me as Angela, ever, so why resort to it now? It’s like you wanted everyone to think you really didn’t remember me. Oh, wow, maybe that is for the best, scratch the Dexatrim reference. I’ll pretend I don’t remember you as well.
Ok, all of those reactions might be a bit of an exaggeration, however, I am a wee bit, ok, not a wee bit, a lot bit pissed off.
It’s like when one of my nephews does it, ok, one did it, so obvious it wasn’t him thanking me for the birthday wishes. It was his wife, that I’ve never met, therefore she really doesn’t know my name. Next time just don’t answer if you don’t know my name.
Angie, how hard it that?
I think I prefer the Angie due to the fact it’s what my mom named me. That is not to say the ones I allow to call me Angela aren’t allowed to. They are, they know who they are, and they know that I am perfectly ok with them calling me that. It is between me and them.
But to the rest of you, allow me to introduce myself: Hello, my name is Angie.
In my defense of this rant I’ve had a lot of caffeine in the form of Black Riffle Coffee.

Product Review Maria Kang’s Belly Ball

I have to put a disclaimer on this before I begin, I have been doing a few product reviews lately. First off, I am not paid to do the reviews and all of the products I have reviewed I have bought or have received a free sample in the mail.
Having said that, let’s get started on my review of Maria Kang’s Belly Ball.
Now I have been eyeing this for roughly a year, I have been intrigued and have wanted this product. The next bit may be a little TMI for some folks, however, I want to keep this as honest as possible.
For years I have suffered with bloating and stomach aches, no matter what I do seems to alleviate it.
Now, some things do cause it, sugar, dairy, things like that. However, even eliminating the offenders doesn’t get rid of the issue completely. I can start out with a flat stomach and by the end of the day I look around 4 months pregnant. It’s painful in more than one way.
I follow Maria Kang on Social Media, I really enjoy her Instagram posts. Well, she talks about the Belly Ball a lot. It is her own invention and really does use it.
It is no secret that I am a huge fan of Maria’s, if you will recall she is the No Excuse mom. She received a lot of flack for the picture she posted with her, looking amazing, with her three sons, the caption, What’s Your Excuse.
I have said it before, I’ll say it now, I wish someone like her had been around when my kids were little. I yo-yo dieted for years, never really understanding nutrition. Until about 6 years ago, then I really began to understand protein, grains, vegetables and how they all played a part. Also refined sugar, so bad for you, anyway, I bought the Belly Ball.
It is an amazing little thing, the first night I used it I felt instant relief from the bloating pain. Now, I am a user of foam rollers and the FasciaBlaster, I am used to hitting spots that are painful and need to be worked out. I have never hit a spot on my abdomen like I did with the Belly Ball.
I love this product, I have seen and felt instant results as far as alleviating the pain and the embarrassment of the bloating issue.
I do believe that the Belly Ball as it exists now is being discontinued, so you will need to hurry. I have already convinced one of my friends to buy it. She also has had a good experience with it.
I highly recommend this product for all women who have digestion issues.
Once again, I was not paid for this review and I paid the full price for the Belly Ball, well no, that is a lie. I had a discount code that I used.
Any questions or complaints can be directed to angie@angieworld.com

My Youngest

I can’t believe my youngest child is 26 today. It doesn’t quite seem real. Wasn’t it just yesterday I found out I was pregnant with him?

Alex you were and continue to be the best surprise. You have grown into the most incredible man. I am amazed at your tenacity, insightfullness and the love you have for your family. 

When I look at you I see so much of my dad in you. You have that ability to look inside a person and see who they are. At times your honesty can seem blunt, however, I’d rather that than subterfuge. 

I hope you never lose your love of life, your ability to make good decisions and your ability to see the truth. 

I love you more than you will ever know, you will always be the best surprise of my life. Happy Birthday! 

Happy Birthday Tessa

Today is my amazing granddaughters 10th birthday. As she enters into the double digit territory I am filled with memories of her as a baby, toddler and finally a little girl.
She enters into the dubious world of pre-teen, and all that entails. There are certain hopes I have for her.
I hope she never loses her wonder of learning new things. I hope she always keeps that innocence about her, the ability to trust and the knowledge that the people that love her will protect her.
I hope I always have the relationship with her that I have now, the one where we laugh at the silliest things and have sword fights. The one where she insists I tell her stories before she goes to sleep when she is with me. They have to be true stories, then she guesses who they are about.
I hope she always keeps that sense of excitement about her, where she very literally jumps for joy at the things we think are simple as adults.
I hope she never outgrows me, that she’ll always want to spend time with me.
I hope more than anything that as she grows up, she understands that she can be anything and go anywhere she wants.
I am picking her up in a little while and we begin our week together. I hope she will want that every year, even when she is grown up.
I know that is unlikely, that she will want to spend time with her friends when she is a teenager. That eventually spending time with Gigi won’t hold the allure it does now.
I will treasure this moment in time, this magical time, the time where for a brief moment I am fun and she enjoys being with me.
Happy Birthday to my beautiful granddaughter, may your whole year be filled with wonder and surprises.

Owasso Reunion

I have been thinking about Owasso a lot lately, not the Owasso of today, but the Owasso of my youth.
With our 35, yes 35, year high school reunion looming on the horizon of course that sets off my memories.
I was teetering on not going, I have not been in a good place in my life and really didn’t want to have to face my more successfully counterparts.
But now, well, life has changed and I feel good again, hopeful, thankful, and yes, happy.
I have a deep love of Owasso, that is not a huge secret. Owasso was the place I learned who I really was, a geeky, nerdy, book loving, sci-fi watching girl. Who seriously made no apologies for any of her quirks. And there were and are many quirks.
It was the first place I felt fully accepted, I had a mom and dad that really wanted me to be there and loved me. I had a best friend, I had a great school, I had so much fun.
It was the place I accepted Christ, in a church that was filled with people just as quirky as I was. A church that was loving, fun and filled with real people, who didn’t shy away from their human failings.
A failing was just a lesson, you could learn from it and not do it again or you could just keep doing what you were doing and keep failing. They would still love and accept you.
It’s where I learned how to shoot a gun, how to cook a roast and how much I hated domestication. Owasso was where I learned my parenting skills, without being taught those I don’t even know what kind of mother I would have been.
Owasso is the place I will always call home, it is a place where I will always run away to when life is overwhelming.
It is a place where I can breath, where I still feel accepted, even though I don’t really know anyone there anymore. I think a few of my high school comrades still live there, but not many.
At times I have thought about returning to live, however, I am firmly entrenched in Texas. The place I have chosen to live, my children are true Texans and now my granddaughter is as well.
I would never leave them, but without Owasso having been in my life, I’m pretty sure there would be no them.
So, to my 35th high school reunion I will go, I will look at my classmates and see them as they were. Young, beautiful, and full of life and ready to take on the world.
As always any questions or criticisms can be directed to angie@angieworld.com

Face Blaster

I have found a fountain of youth miracle, in a little product called the Face Blaster, created by Ashley Black. If you will remember a while back I bought the Fascia Blaster, and loved it.
Well, I have been coveting the Face Blaster for a few months. I have been watching the women on Facebook posting miracle, turn back the clock, results with this product.
It’s no secret I have had a rough couple of years and they have aged me greatly. It is also no secret I have zero plans to age gracefully. I don’t want to, I don’t care who knows it and I don’t care who judges me.
I fully believe that by using Mary Kay Skin Care products and good genetics have slowed the aging process in my skin. I needed more help than that now, stress can be a huge factor in the aging process.
I have eliminated a huge amount of stress in my life, so now is the time to focus on my looks. I don’t care who judges me for that. Judge away people, judge away, because while you are busy judging I am busy turning back the clock.
On Mother’s Day this year I decided to gift myself the Face Blaster, I had some funds in a few shopping apps that I participate in, money wasn’t a factor. So I did it, I took the plunge and ordered it.
I waited with bated breath for it to arrive, it took the longest three weeks ever.
It arrived on a Saturday, I eagerly tore open the box, there it was, my own personal time travel product.
To say I am amazed is an understatement. This tiny tool has given me back my face. The lines are disappearing along with the sagging skin, it is firming everything on my face, neck and shoulders.
It hurt at first, because the muscles in my neck were so tight and it was painful to run the tool over them. But as I continued “blasting” they loosened up and now it doesn’t hurt.
the lines around my mouth have all but disappeared, the lines around my eyes are getting lighter in appearance. I feel free, I feel light and I feel like myself once again. I will post pictures of my progress at the end of this entry.
I highly recommend this product, I not only use the Face Blaster on my face I am using it on my calves as well.
My calves have been rock hard and painful to the touch as long as I can remember. When I get a pedicure I cry if they try to massage my calves. I beg them to stop, this tool has worked out the hardness and now they are almost pliable. So much this little thing can do.
I highly recommend the Face Blaster along with the Fascia Blaster. I am still in awe of that product as well, I am in less pain with my IT band and also my shoulders hurt less and my posture has improved.
God Bless Ashley Black for inventing these products, and making them available to the public. No, I am not getting paid to say this, all of my product reviews are totally my own and products I have bought myself.
As usual if there are any questions please feel free to email me at angie@angieworld.com