Happy Birthday Jeffrey Andrew

Dear Jeffrey,

 

I still remember the day you were born, 30 years later and it is still crystal clear. They took you two weeks early, that’s what they used to do with scheduled C-sections. The doctor told your dad he looked like a Japanese tourist, he was taking so many pictures.

I knew you were a boy from the start, I’ll admit, I wanted a girl due to fear, I had already had one son and lost him, I couldn’t handle the thought of it happening again. Then you were here, in all of your baby perfection, then they whisked you away and put you in the Neo-natal unit. You were born with water on your lungs, common for a baby born of a scheduled C-section back then, as they took you too early.

I had to go home without you, it was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do, go home and look at the empty crib. Taking you home was one of the happiest days of my life, you were an amazing miracle, who cried a lot.

Watching you grow from a baby to a toddler to a little boy going to kindergarten, then middle school, then high school then adulthood, it all happened way too fast. I wish I could go back and do it all again, I would do a lot of things differently. I would listen more, talk less, play more and tell you more often how much I love you.

I still can’t believe you are thirty years old, I am so proud of the man you have become, the parent that you are, you are still that miracle in my life.

I pray for you every day, that you have great joy in your life, that you have people who truly appreciate the person you are and that you continue to have an amazing bond with your child.

Today on your birthday I want you to know that I love you beyond words, that you are still that miracle baby boy. I want you to know that you are without a doubt one of the best things that ever happened to me.

 

I love you,

Mom

 

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