My Theory

I have a theory, a theory on why women seem to be behaving badly on a higher level these days. I formed my theory last night, at the annual Christmas shindig of The Ladies that Lunch. We were talking about how enjoyable it was to get together and talk just the girls. One of the women then said that women don’t have an outlet like they used to, in the days before electricity, internet and television, there used to be sewing circles, quilting bees and other gatherings, where the men raised barns or helped with the crops and the women would gather, talk, share experiences, give advice to the younger ones or comfort a grieving widow, mother or sister. Then came the industrial revolution, people moved to the cities, where there were still the sewing circles, the quilting bees and the general feeling of helpfulness. Then came the suburbs, coffee clutches replaced sewing circles, then came WWII, women went to into the workforce like never before. There was no time for coffee clutches, quilting bees or sewing circles, this is when women began to lose close contact with one another.
When you don’t have the close contact with women friends it is easy to betray them, it is easy to hurt someone faceless. With the internet, text messaging, instant messenger, facebook, twitter and yes myspace, you can behave as badly as you want and no one will find out.
Only that is not the case, someone always finds out and someone always gets hurt. Women need to get back to gathering together. We need the camaraderie, the support of other women, when we lose that we lose a closeness, an accountability, we lose a part of ourselves. I would never dream of purposely hurting another woman, I believe it is because I have close friendships with so many, I meet on a monthly basis with a group of women that give me support, love, acceptance and a place where we all listen to each other and commiserate, celebrate and lift each other up. I wish other women had this, perhaps it is time to bring back the sewing circles, coffee clutches, quilting bees and even the book clubs.

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