There is a topic that I am passionate about; it is something that actually got me an invitation to leave the singles group at the church I attended. Every week I would attend the class and listen to the people, “Oh if only God would bring someone into my life it would be perfect.” This was from men and women alike. One day I couldn’t take it anymore, I had held my tongue for a long time, actually my friends would have been proud of me. I stood up and said being in a relationship is hard work, it is not easy if it is done the right way, you are not a half of a whole. God created whole human beings and until you can wake up every day and ask God, ok, what are we doing today? And be completely happy with where you are in life, then God will not bring the person you are meant to be with into your life. If you are meant to be with someone. It is a hard truth; you have to be happy with your singleness and be whole with who you are before you can give any part of yourself to another person.
Something I saw yesterday bothered me equally as much, where have all of the good men gone. Well, ladies, allow me to answer, they are under your noses. They are the ones you ignore in order to have the thrill of the bad boy, the man who treats you like, well, for lack of a better word, crap. Until you look at the ones who are not Brad Pitt pretty and the ones that are, well, slightly dorky, or maybe completely dorky and geeky, after all they rule the world, and continue to look at the men who are aloof, distant, who play hard to get emotionally, and let’s face it, we all want what we can’t have, then you will continue to bemoan the fact there are no “good” ones around.
I believe I am unusual in the fact I never looked, I was completely good with my singleness, reveled in it, as a matter of fact. I didn’t need anyone in my life. Once I went to a psychiatrist, after the death of my mother, as we were talking, he asked me if I wanted to get married again. I said, “Oh God No!” He put down his pen, looked at me and asked why not. I told him, while I was not opposed to dating and getting married, I just had a very full, busy life. If God wants me to date, and eventually get married, He will have to bring the man over, hit me in the head and say this one dummy. He told me I was the most mentally healthy person he had ever met, which made me completely unusual.
Here is my advice to the singles out there, get to know who you are, what you like and don’t like, much like Julia Roberts in “The Runaway Bride”, taste all of the styles of eggs to figure out which is your favorite. And when you are “whole” and “healed” from the trauma of past bad relationships and completely satisfied with being single, then ZAP.
If anyone hates me after this, so be it, but I stand by my thoughts. Be complete, and then you will be happy.

3 Replies to “Completeness”

  1. Amen!
    And on behalf of all the guys out there Angie described, I say “here we are! Angie has directions to us!” 🙂

  2. I love this post. You are so right! I have been guilty of looking for and hooking up with the wrong guys for silly, superficial reasons. But that was my past. As I get older, I am more content with being alone, for the time being. I don’t think its my destiny to be alone. But I don’t want to go looking and find the wrong person. I have something in the works now, but I am taking it very slow. I’d rather be alone than to be in an unhappy, unproductive relationship.

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